Rekindle the spark and
start having more sex.
Therapy for Differences of Desire in Georgia
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You want sex. She doesn’t.
It’s a tale as old as time. You’re in the mood and she isn’t. Sure, you can handle the occasional sting of rejection. But nowadays, it feels like every time you try to initiate sex, your partner turns you down. This isn’t what you signed up for!
Undesired. Frustrated. Angry. Unwanted. Disconnected. This is how most men I help describe their feelings after unsuccessfully trying to initiate sex. “Why does she have all the control, they ask?” “Why do my needs always take a back seat to her emotional turmoil?” “It’s like she isn’t even trying … and it makes me mad”
You can only live like this for so long before you just stop trying.
Over time, lust is replaced by resentment. It feels like you’re on opposite ends of a teeter totter and there isn’t any way to get balance. But, you don’t want to resent your wife … you just want to figure out why she is withholding sex.
Chances are, she really does want to have more sex with you. But, to get there, she needs to feel loved, heard, and connected. Therapy can help you both bridge the gap between your differences in desire.
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What if sex didn’t have to be so much work?
You’re busy enough at the office. The last thing you want at home is for sex to feel like another job. Your wife is supposed to be your lover, not someone else you have to manage.
Therapy can help you both feel emotionally and physically close — without the tension of unmet needs hanging over you. When you understand her need for emotional safety, and she understands your desire for physical closeness, the path to intimacy becomes a lot clearer.
- No more guessing.
- No more negotiations.
- No more constant rejection.
- Yes more sex.
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Ready to feel wanted again?
Hi, I’m Amy Barth, and I’m here to help.
Let’s be honest. Even without the pressures of sex, marriage is really, really difficult. I say that as someone who has been married for decades … and who has spent plenty of time in couples therapy with my husband.
As a therapist, I use a mix of direct, no-nonsense strategies to help couples cut through the noise and quickly get to the heart of their issues. I don’t just talk theory — I give you practical exercises to help you reconnect both emotionally and physically.
By understanding what’s really going on beneath the surface, you can rebuild the connection you once had — in the bedroom and beyond. Reach out today to get started.
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How I Get Results
My approach is based in Relational Life Therapy (RLT), which helps couples create emotional safety, communicate openly, listen deeply, and respect each other’s needs. Here are some ways we make this happen in a Georgia couples therapy session:
- Build emotional safety (so she feels secure and open)
- Create emotional connection (so you both feel closer outside the bedroom)
- Foster empathy (so she understands why sex matters to you, and you understand her needs too)
- Change the way you approach intimacy (instead of repeating the same old patterns)
- Schedule intimacy (because sometimes planning it takes the pressure off)
- Build anticipation(using small gestures throughout the day to reignite the spark)
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Success Story
John and Jane hadn’t had sex in nine months.
After just two sessions, they began to reconnect physically and emotionally.
Reach out today to get started
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Why Did the Desire Fade?
Remember when things were hot and heavy? She was ready to go anytime, anywhere. The passion was electric, and you didn’t have to guess whether she wanted you.
In all likelihood, you’ve always had differences in sexual desire. However, in the beginning there was a lot more non-sexual intimacy. Hand holding. Gentle caresses. Long hugs. A passionate kiss goodbye in the morning. These little acts of love are what kept the spark alive.
Before you increase the heat, you need to rekindle the spark.
Ready to start? Focus on those small, shared moments that bring you closer—whether it’s a touch, a conversation, or just spending time together. The physical part will follow naturally when the emotional connection is there.
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Why Does She Pull Away?
Here’s a secret you probably already know. Except for those moments of pure passion, most women require an emotional connection to get in the mood. Without it, sex becomes the last thing on their mind.
Meanwhile, most men think “any time is a good time for sex.” On a physical level, it feels great, relieves tension, and leads to a good night sleep. But, if you’re honest with yourself, sex also helps you feel connected, close, loved, seen, and desired. That’s why it stings so much when she turns away.
It feels like she’s rejecting YOU (not just saying no to the act of sex).
I help couples bridge the gap, so you both get what you need. When you understand her need for emotional connection and she understands your desire for physical closeness, the path to intimacy becomes a lot clearer. Reach out today to learn more.
You want sex 2-3x per WEEK. She’s ok with 1-2x per MONTH … if that.
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How Do You Increase Intimacy?
- Appreciate each other daily. Take a moment to express gratitude for the little things, whether it's a kind gesture or just being there.
- Celebrate the small wins. Every bit of progress counts. Recognize and appreciate the little steps you take toward rebuilding intimacy.
- Connect outside the bedroom. Non-sexual intimacy—like holding hands, cuddling, or spending quality time together—fosters closeness without any pressure.
- Schedule Sex. Don’t depend on spontaneity. Scheduling sex might sound unromantic and robotic, but it builds emotional anticipation and gives both of you time to get in the right mindset.
- Focus on shared experiences. Plan activities together that you both enjoy, creating memories and emotional closeness outside of sexual intimacy.
- Practice small gestures every day. A quick love note, a whispered compliment, or a quiet moment together can work wonders when desire feels distant.
- Take a timeout during conflicts. When things heat up, take a break. Cool off and come back to the conversation with a clear head.
- Try new ways to connect. Break routine by exploring different forms of connection—whether it’s a hobby together, a new date idea, or experimenting with intimacy in fresh ways.
- Understand your partner's love language. Whether it’s words of affirmation, acts of service, or physical touch, knowing what makes your partner feel loved can deepen your connection.
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Want to have more sex with your wife?
Schedule a consult to see how I can help you increase intimacy and work throgu differences in sexual desire.
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What is Relational Life Therapy (RLT)?
For many women, emotional safety is the key to unlocking physical intimacy. If she doesn’t feel heard, understood, or respected, forget about the bedroom—she’s just not going to be interested. But when she feels safe and emotionally connected? That’s when things start to heat up again.
This is where Relational Life Therapy (RLT) comes in. RLT is all about creating that emotional safety by teaching couples how to communicate openly, listen deeply, and respect each other’s needs. It’s more than just talking—it’s about full-respect living. That means learning how to interact with love and respect, even when you’re in the middle of a heated conflict.
During an RLT couples therapy session, we dive into what’s really going on beneath the surface, helping you both understand how your behavior impacts each other. When you build emotional safety, you’re laying the foundation for real intimacy—the kind that makes her want to be close to you, physically and emotionally.
In short, when you start living with mutual respect, emotional safety becomes second nature—and so does reconnecting in the bedroom.
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How is RLT different than traditional couples therapy?
RLT is different from traditional couples therapy, in that it’s more direct and practical. I don’t simply sit back and observe. Instead, I call out dysfunctional patterns directly, offering clear and actionable feedback to rekindle your romance.
Be ready — I sometimes take sides in therapy and might focus on one partner for an entire session, while the other partner listens. This helps you learn how to listen to each other.
Relational Life Therapy is all about taking responsibility for YOUR role in your relationship.
It’s always easier to just blame your spouse for the lack of sex. But that mirror needs to reflect back on you too. No hiding. We’ll dive into trauma, do inner child work, and go as deep as we need to break down the walls that are keeping you from connecting. Before you know it, you’re booking your ticket to O-town.
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What does an RLT couples therapy session look like?
I always start by asking, “How’s the last week been?” We check in on whether or not you tried any of the exercises we discussed in previous sessions. If so, we celebrate progress. If not, we explore why and adjust our approach.
I don’t allow couples to rehash fights during sessions. That kind of behavior only reinforces the negative patterns you are trying to break. Instead, we focus on new ways of interacting, trying out different behaviors that might lead to better outcomes.
I help couples identify their relationship dance, the pattern of behavior they fall into. For example, “every time he pokes at you, you withdraw. So, if he didn’t poke at you, maybe you wouldn’t withdraw.” Recognizing these behaviors allows couples to break the cycle and try new ways of relating to each other.
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Increase your connection in the bedroom and beyond.
Schedule a consult to see if RLT can help you reconnect with your partner.
TRY THIS AT HOME
Date Nights with a Twist
Forget the usual date night where you end up talking about the kids, bills, or all the stressors of life. Instead, I encourage couples to schedule a “date night” where those topics are completely off-limits. Instead, talk about anything that makes you feel light and connected—an amazing story, a beautiful sunset, or even a funny memory from the past.
But here’s the twist: each partner takes turns planning these nights, and the details? Keep them a surprise! Whether it’s what to wear or where you’re going, the element of mystery keeps things fresh and exciting. It’s all about rediscovering each other without the weight of everyday life dragging you down. When you start enjoying each other’s company again, the emotional connection will naturally grow—and the physical connection will follow.
Quiet Connection: Intimacy Without Words
Sometimes, words aren’t necessary to reconnect. That’s where the Quiet Connection exercise comes in. Here’s how it works: sit together in a comfortable spot, turn on some calming music, and just sync your breathing. Don’t talk—just be together, breathing in unison, letting go of any pressure to “fix” things in that moment.
This non-verbal exercise is incredibly powerful because it helps you feel close without the need for words. When you sync up physically, you start to feel connected emotionally too. It’s a simple but profound way to rebuild intimacy, even when words are hard to find.
And yes, at some point down the line, an exercise like that might lead to sex.
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Reach out and ask me anything.
Success Story
A couple came to me in crisis: he felt unloved and rejected, while she often blamed her ADHD and exhaustion for their lack of intimacy. One night, he had carefully laid the groundwork for sex—only for her to go to bed without a word, leaving him fuming.
The next day, they had sex, but the frustration was already brewing beneath the surface. His anger turned into passive-aggressive behavior—indirect jabs, coldness, and emotional distance. After being turned down so many times, he was shell-shocked, avoiding affection altogether because the sting of rejection had worn him down.
I helped them unpack the real issue: his desire for sex wasn’t just about the physical act—it was about craving connection, being seen, and feeling desired. I showed him how his passive-aggressive behavior was pushing her further away, and how to express his needs without bitterness. For her, I reframed his need for sex, helping her understand that it wasn’t just about his physical desires—it was about his need for emotional vulnerability and closeness.
Once she got it, things changed. She began to approach him with empathy, realizing that sex was more about emotional connection for him. Slowly, they broke the toxic cycle, with him no longer lashing out passive-aggressively and her initiating intimacy more willingly. In just a few sessions, they reignited the spark and found the emotional and physical connection they had been missing.
If you’re ready to do the work, I’m here to help.
